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Of late I have been pondering the future of my company, Classic Kippers.
Of course I plan on staying at the helm for sometime, but let’s face it, I am long in the tooth and my muzzle is gray. Bottom line – I need a protégé. Truthfully, the duties are so vast as CEO, that having someone on board to learn the ropes from me would be ideal. I’m quite frustrated if the truth be known. Sophie Peach tried to step into my paw prints, and does certainly help in many ways, but the FACE of Classic Kippers cannot wear pearls. I mean after all, we are known for our signature bow ties are we not?
Mom has brought home potential prospects, four in fact, which she rescued from surrounding parishes and counties. A couple were entirely too bullish! They were big males who thought they were going to run the show- NOT HAPPENING! My company, my show. Despite the fact that we were neutered, it was some what of a testosterone nightmare. Let’s face it, a gonadectomy does not have total control over sexually dimorphic behaviors. SHEESH! The two who appeared to have potential, we’re just too strong for my mom to handle on a lead. (Her knees are titanium you know.) Side note: before I was rescued, all of my parent’s English bull terriers were 65-90 pounds. I arrived tipping the scales at 27 pounds. Granted I was a tad scrawny, but after proper care, I now weigh 50 pounds. Mom has decided that English bull terriers, 50 pounds or under, are a much better size for public appearances and of course, for her to walk. It’s not to say that we don’t think those big fellas are magnificent, because we do, but we also realize that good things come in small packages – like “MOI”!
Unfortunately, at twelve, I do not have unlimited time to find a protégé. Especially as I would like to train him myself. Although mom is continuing to look for a protégé through her rescue position, it’s apparent that there is only one thing for me to do and that is to clone myself. Most of you aware that I am quite the student and always enjoyed learning new things. So I shall endeavor to learn the finer points of cloning. Mom and dad find my idea a bit dubious, but my mind is made up and being a hardheaded bull terrier, I’m going for it! Mom and I had quite the tête-à-tête over it, because she worries about my clone having my genetic abnormalities, but in the end I claimed victory! I’m just certain that I will be able to pick and choose the DNA make up of my protégé.
I do hope that you will follow me on my journey, as I try to find the perfect protégé whether he be cloned or rescued.
TO DO LIST:
1. Hit the library
2. Ferret out books on cloning
3. Secure a private lab
for cloning purposes.